So, from May 27 to May 31, leave a comment on this post and win the apron below. Anyone interested in the apron is welcome to leave a comment but must include something that your child or someone else's child said that is particularly funny. My husband, who fancies himself seriously hilarious, will be reading them all and judging the winner. Just a hint: the more inappropriate the comment the better. I'm currently home with our newborn and also a mother to a newly two-year old, so our whole world is kids right now. Please, we need some levity brought to the situation.
Just a note on the fabric of the apron, the main portion is from a never-used tablecloth and the weave is quite loose. So, it might require special care when washed, like a gentle cycle and low temperature dry. I'm not sure about that but if you wanted to be cautious that would be the approach to take. Also, I've posted the apron in the Angry Chicken Tie One On gallery along with a recipe for strawberry-rhubarb pie so the winner can let me know if they would also like the recipe. I have no idea how many people (if any!) will leave comments but I will try to be prompt in announcing a winner. Please leave your email so I can respond to you.
157 comments:
I'm in baby ! I can't believe you can find time to sew. It's amazing, maybe sleepless nights agree with your crafty side, or is it just getting your body back is enough. ?
I'm in!
Yesterday my 4 year old son walked out of my room with my pink lace bra in one hand....."I love this boob-holder Mum, it's really beautiful".
It was hilarious!
Oh, please count me in (it's already Wed here in Australia)! I love aprons and this one is so cute.
You have been busy! Your work is wonderful; I love seeing all the new aprons. You have me thinking I need to make one (or three) too. No need to enter me in the giveaway - just wanted to say hello. It seems you are getting your creative space in order - it does help to have a dedicated place where you have your supplies, but also a steady stream of inspirational images, fabrics, etc. Keep it up!
Okay, you want inappropriate... I lived with my aunt and uncle for a while - I was 21 and my cousin was 9. One day she commented on the oversized shirt I was wearing. I explained that it was very roomy and comfortable. A few minutes later, so plopped down on my bed, and complained that the mattress was too firm. Again, I explained that a firm mattress was more comfortable for my back. She thought for a moment, then very innocently exclaimed, "So you like things that are big and hard!"
my sister's baby isn't in the taking stages yet, so right now he's funniest at farting. she's a teacher so she's got lots of kids say the funniest things stories. the best was when one of her students picked up a bag of m&m's and gleefully chuckled, "I get to share, all by myself!"
So yesterday my still-nursing toddler was out with me and looked at my chest. My boobs are growing with my pregnancy, and she's seemed to notice. She exclaimed "Oooh, boobies. Mmmm, yum! Mama boobies!"
Thanks for the great giveaway!
Oh my 4 year old has tons of great quotes. We asked him the other day, "What does OFF spell?" He says, "I dunno, UFO?" Then we asked, "What does ON spell?" He says "OK?"
Last Sunday on the way to church he hollered from the back seat, "My shoelaces are all mixed up!"
He wrapped the baby up in a blanket a few months ago and said, "Look, I waddled her!"
And he came in one day and told me he needed Dad's clippers (garden trimmers, he meant). He continued, "I'll tell you why I need them. To make the world a better place."
Best of luck with your newborn!
My 8 year old daughter out of the blue said to me "Mom, there's a lady who lost her leg, so she had to quit her job, but she needed money so she got another job. Where does she work now?" I said "I dunno" & she said "IHOP"! I was so surprised she remembered & delivered a joke so well! I giggled.
Thanks for the giveaway!
www.craftyheidi.wordpress.com
I'm in I'm in, so cute!
My three year old, at my in-laws house, said lovingly to his aunt, who was bending over to put in a dvd for him " aunt mary, I like your butt! " in the most sincere way.
here's another.....a ahemmmm.
The same child who lives with me is in the midst of potty training, which means naked all the time. Says to me yesterday while I'm visiting with my neighbor, " look mama I can make my penis move allll over the place"
My daughter: knock knock
Me: whos there?
Daughter: Smell mop...
Me: Smell mop who..
Daughter: Ha-ha..you said "smell my po"
She is 6 and just finishing up Kinedergarten...oh the stuff they bring home from school!
come check out my giveaway too...good luck with new baby..
Great apron.
I can only think off hand of my cousin-she used to insist that planes were really small-like you see them in the sky,and my mom would say-no they're really big ,with lots of people inside.So one day we drove by the airport and we saw planes on the ground my mom said-see they're really big and my cousin replied-i told YOU so!
Oooh, love the apron. Okay, I don't know about innappropriate, but this IS funny. I was discussing shapes with my 2 year old. I would point to something in the room and ask him what shape it was. I pointed to my eyes and asked "what shape are my eyes?" He thought a minute and then said proudly: "football shape!" We cracked up.
What an adorable little apron! The pockets just make it! Fabulous job!
oops, forgot my email: jndrysdale@gmail.com
So just the other day, my toddler, who is doing very well with her manners, spilled my water. I was in a mood that day, but I am never really harsh, so I said sarcastically, "Thank you for spilling my water." About 5 minutes went by, and she says, "You're welcome, Mommy." By then I had forgotten about the whole things, so I ask her what I am welcome for and she says, "You're welcome for spilling your water!" Oh boy!
Yehudim@aol.com
Glad I found your blog! Can't wait to read more! Here is saying from my girlfriends little girl, "Can you heeeeeeaaaaaaaar the pee peeeeeeee in my pooooooottyyyyyyyy" over and over again, like a little songbird.
What a darling project! Choose me! I'd love to win your sweet apron. leafygreenes at gmail dot com
I would love this apron! The only one I have I inherited from my husbands Grandpa. Needles to say it isn't very lady like!
I can't resist your requirement! Today I was at the zoo with my daughter's preschool class and we were watching the tortoises. My daughter said to me, "Mama, look that turtle is crushing the other one." I'll leave it to your imagination as to what they were truly doing. :)
I love the apron and I have a grandaughter who is hillarious and she asked her mom why are there so many nipples on your face! She meant pimples. Too funny
apparently my daughter hates being on swings...but when other kids are swinging she likes to stand near them and yell "weeeeeee" as if she is having the time of her life!
elkesten at yahoo dot com
Somedays I feel like i live with Will Farrell's mini me. My two year old says the darndest thing.... anything from commentary on his "naked-s" to asking me why I am serving him "fucky" (he meant Yucky) dinner.
And to top it all off... everytime he toots he blames his sister. HE'S 2!!!
DIBS ON THE APRON! Damn, wish I had a really good Veronica quote, but she's mostly funny when we make her repeat things that we say. (I know; we're mean.)
A 16 month-old little girl running around screaming "skate or die!" always makes us happy, though.
Cute blog... I really like the apron. Congrats on you new baby ;)
laura@beckcentral.net
I wish my baby would say something... he just says Bahhhhh!!! all the time! He's 13 months old, what can I say? I need an apron to stay clean around him!
My husband was in a public restroom with my son, washing their hands, when my son turned to him, pointed at the man walking out of a cubicle, and said "I think he did a poo poo. It's stinky in here".
Kids, eh? That's a really cute apron.
My 3 year old grandaughter told me "Mamoe you boobs are long"
I'm all for a new apron! A few days ago, my 3 year old son asked me why I was cleaning him off. I said 'cause he was dirty. He asked why he was dirty. I said because he was playing in the dirt. His face lit up and he said "Dirt is really dirty! I never knew that before!"
Such a great apron! No kids in my world yet, but apparently when I was little, I was in the parked car with my mom waiting outside of pre-school. She turned the car on and I asked what she was doing. She said she was turning on the car to checking the digital clock to see if we were too early to go in. I then asked her if she had a watch. She said yes. I said, "What? Can't you tell time?" Ah, my mother must have loved me.
funny things...
my fiances five-year-old niece said this while in the car with us on saturday: "Your arms are touching the walls. Get it, walls!" and the proceeded to laugh herself silly.
My little princess said to her father 'you're a big fat man papa'. I said 'Katie, that's not nice' so she amended it 'you're a nice fat man papa'.
Beautiful apron!
Mike (in response to learning that sex can speed up the onset of labor): "Yeah, makes sense. If a giant penis was banging on my walls, I'd move, too."
Sign me up, baby.
I would love to win this apron. My friend (due in June and HUGE) doesn't have any shirts that cover her belly all the way. Her son told her that she's growing the baby too big and he's peaking from under her shirt.
That apron is super-cute, so I guess I'm lucky that I have two kids (one of whom is named Tigerlily!) who are constantly saying ridiculous things, huh?
But this is my favorite: My 2-year-old son loves sticks. Everywhere we go he finds sticks, the bigger the better. He also loves to make up little songs about what he's doing throughout the day, and he pronounces "st" sounds as hard "d"s. So on a walk the other day, after finding a particularly awesome and large stick, he commenced loudly singing, "My big dick! I got a big dick!"
Is that inappropriate enough for ya?
i love the apron but i'm afraid my newborn doesn't talk yet! he does have some really loud and long gas...
very pretty apron!
Sorry, my husband was gabbing in the background and I forgot to leave my funny comment in my first comment. So, here it is....my 3 year old son had a habit of going up to people and sniffing them and saying "what's that smell?" It was from Bear in the Big Blue House and Bear always smelled something good like toothpaste or pancakes....but people rarely seemed to know that.
That's gorgeous! Aprons are my weakness. Okay, and chocolate. And babies, but not for eating, obviously, just sniffing and kissing. I'm getting off track... Hmmm. Well, other than calling his daddy by his first name, my 20 month old doesn't yet go for inappropriate (oh, but no doubt he soon will!) But he does like to stand up and yell, "AMEN!" in church when said daddy has been preaching too long for Luke's taste!
My son is just learning to talk, and this weekend we were at a restaurant and he kept saying (as loud as possible, of course), "poo poo, mama!" "poo poo dada!"
I swear he didn't have a dirty diaper.
kldemare at yahoo dot com
i have two funnies that come to mind!
1) my friend's son said to her: "mommy when i grow up i want to be just like you and have one big boob"
2) i was teaching at a preschool and one day out on the playground, i was sitting with a little girl when she started patting my legs. she said to me "you know what your legs feel like??? hot dogs!"
too funny!
My husband's cousin brought over a date and my (at-the-time) 2-year-old says, in that PIERCING voice that they have, "Mom! What happened to her dress, it is missing!" It was pretty short... Daughter then proceeds to exclaim that the girl has "big boobs". Also, true.
I thought this was amusing from my 3yo:
We are outside, I'm pulling weeds from the rose bushes and Noah is riding around the patio on his tricycle ....
N: Mom?
ME: Yes?
N: Do dinosaurs have butts?
M: Well, dinosaurs don't exist anymore. But they did have butts I suppose.
N: Oh, okay. Then dinosaurs rode bicycles?
M: [pause] They could have ridden bicycles I guess if bicycles had been invented then.
N: Okay.
The other day I read a wonderful child quote -
"Mum. Does dad poo standing up too?"
:)
PS. I also read about a father who was looking after his little girl while his wife was out. The little girl kept filling up a plastic tea cup, to play tea, and getting Daddy to drink it while he watched the cricket. She kept running back and forth filling up the tea cup. When mummy got home, daddy reassured her that they had had a fine time and he had been drinking her tea. At which point mummy started laughing and laughing. Where can a two year old reach to get water from?
Uh-huh.
The toilet!
:)
Oh, it's supposed to something a KID said... I never did follow instructions very well. (Which is why I'll never be able to make an apron by myself). And I think Mike qualifies.
Love the apron!
Today at Target, my 2 yo son introduced himself to the cashier (a young boy himself) by saying "My name is Grayson and this is my siser Caroline". Clear as day! So strange coming out of his little tiny body!
I have a 7 month old, a 2.5 year old, and a almost 4 year old, so I soooooooooooooooo understand when you say you need some laughter. If I won this apron, I think it would be great for hiding little treats in the pocket for my little girl who is in the process of being potty trained. Hey and if there is an accident it would work great to help quickly mop up the messes. (Just thinking like a desperate mom here. He he!) I would be thrilled to win it! Thank you for giving me the opportunity.
A few cute stories to give you a laugh. My 2 year old calls toothpaste "poopaste"---yummy! Also, my 4 year old recently spilled water on his shirt and said, "I can't deal with this!" I wonder where he hears that! Gotta love 'em!
heathervanhoof[at]yahoo[dot]com
Hmm, how about the time I asked my nephew what his new baby brother had for dinner? Which he answered "BOOOOOOOOOOOOBS!"
:D
I took my 4 year old on one of the amusement park rides and at the end it had a dip that you went down that made you lose your belly. In front of everyone in our carriage on the ride my lovely son then announced 'oh mum that made my willy feel funny'!
I love the apron. jjnida at yahoo dot com
When I was pregnant with my first child my little nephew was wanting to know if he could feel the baby kick and i said yes. Instead of putting his hand on my belly he put it on my boob. The whole family had a good laugh.
Great apron... I'll lead off with my 2 1/2 year old. We go to alot of hockey games, and when the game is over she always asks. "Hockey done?" and we answer yes. Well the other day in church after we were done singing and it was quiet she proceeded to ask if hockey was done. Our friends in front of us burst out laughing and I think I found a new shade of red.
And to close it up...We were leaving the grocery store and they hand out suckers to the kids there. I asked Eve what she should say, and her response to the clerk and was a "Thanks sucker" in a outside voice!
Okay, here's my kid quote which I forgot earlier. When I was 2 and a half my mother was completely mortified when I asked her on the bus, "Mummy, why are that ladies boobies bigger than yours?" I'm not sure she ever took me on a bus again!
super cute apron :) count me in !
When our son was 5 yr..(he's 18yrs now) we asked him to pick up his toys before he went to bed and with his hands on his hips said "I can't, my legs are broken" and off to bed he went.
Dad moved those toys to the cellar and the next morning he couldn't find them! He picked them up after that. LOL
Enjoy your children..the time goes by very fast.
I don't have any kids - so I am just gonna say this:
That apron is absolutely adorable!! You're so kind to give it away and the winner is one VERY lucky person!
Also... If you'd publish the pie recipe, I'd be happy! ;)
Take care! :D
Just cuz I love this story... When reading a book about the Easter story to my preschool class, one little girl asked, "Did it kill Jesus when they nailed him to a cross."
I answered, "Sadly, yes."
A little boy immediately responded, "Geeze, we didn't they just use duck tape?"
Cute apron... thanks for the chance to win!
beautiful apron.
When we used to ask our daughter how much she loved her brother, she would answer "fourty dollars"!
Oh my - my 3 yo is king of inappropriate comments. Right now his big thing is yelling "Pooter!" when he or my 1 yo farts. Wherever they are. And when he was almost 2, I was in target trying on bathing suits, and of course he was with me. Luckily he was calling boobs "booboos" at the time, because that ALL he said the entire time I was trying on the bathing suits. "Booboos! Booboos!"
My friend recently posted this on Facebook and I thought it was too funny. They were at the park with the kids and the oldest, a girl, does something she shouldn't and then tries to lie about it. My friend says to her "Do you think I was born yesterday?" and her daughter replies "not with those wrinkles."
Well, I don't have kids, but I do agree that they are generally hilarious in their commentary! LOL! When we were little my cousin (just a bit younger than me) was staring at my dad. Understand that my Dad is not a small man. My Daddy looked at her and saw that she was obviously curious about something so he asked her what she was thinking. She looked up at him and said with great excitement in her voice, "Are you going to have a baby?" LOL!
Oops.
This is beautiful….
One thing that I still lol about is my lil' brother (he's 20 now) ~ he LOVED Little Cesar’s pizza and in Church he would shake peoples hands and said "Pizza Pizza" instead of peace be with you! What a ham!
Good luck with the little one ~ Thank you for the giveaway!
I love this apron - it is so spring/summery and beautiful!
So my story is about a friends' kids in the grocery store. She has two boys, 3 and 1, one loves crackers but says it like the word "cock" and the other loves bob the builder, but it comes out sounding like "bob the dildo".
So imagine the day when they were both just on the edge, one is reaching for crackers in the cart and the other notices bob the builder fruit chewys and at the same time you hear "cock!" and "bob the dildo" echoing out of aisle 3.
Suffice it to say she was out of there as fast as possible!
thanks so much,
suserat at yahoo dot com
I have no funny story as my little girl doesn't talk much yet, and the other little one's I'm around haven't said anything I can recall as hilarious lately. However, that apron is adorable!
I was visiting some friends with little girls, and the four-year-old was sitting in my lap, playing with my hair. She looks at me, points to my chest, and says, "Those are big!" :) It was cute. Thanks for the giveaway!
I am a SAHM to three kids (the oldest will be turning four on Monday, so you can imagine......)
the funniest thing to happen in our house recently doesn't so much involve WORDS as it does nudity. As in, our soon-to-be four year old daughter LOVES to be in the buff and gets herself out of her clothes frequently. One afternoon I was on the phone (with, um, the cable company or someone important) when Lady walked by starkers with a bucket over her head. No announcement, no fanfare, just a naked Lady with her head clad in a bucket, on her way to the pantry for a snack.
She's also prone to pop out from behind any given corner in the house, buck naked, and shaking her booty for your very enjoyment.
She is never allowed to go on Spring Break.
My teenage daughter is totally influenced by her peers. She told me in March that Crocs (the shoes) are edible. See my blog for the whole story! www.hootieshappenings.blogspot.com
Thanks for a chance to win! :)
hootie364@gmail.com
Oh great idea for comments - my favorite is when my 3 year old son Cole said, "today is a great day in Cole's world".
Great apron. Thanks for the giveaway. I can be contacted thru my blog: www.luscofamily.blogspot.com
My son is especially good at embarassing me in public...he likes to call me "Hot Mama" - loudly!
When pregnant w/my second daughter, my 2 1/2 year old daughter, Amber, knew that I was growing a 'baby in my belly'. We were at my In law's house for Thanksgiving and my Father In Law was walking around without his shirt on, and he happens to have an ENORMOUS belly. My innocent, adorable daughter proceeded to ask me, my husband and Mother in law," is Granddaddy growing a baby in his belly?" We all about rolled on the floor, and the best part was that she didn't even know that he was standing right behind her when she asked!
My daughter is only 9 months and hasn't even had her first word yet, but my nieces say funny things all the time!
My brother is a big Survivor fan and he and his wife and daughter were sitting at the dinner table eating the other night talking about Survivor. My niece turned to my brother and said "Daddy, I am going to vote you off of the island." My brother responded, "Kensi, that is not a nice thing to say, would you want me to vote you off of the island?" To which she responded "You can't daddy, I won immunity!!!" haha so cute
So sweet!
I love the tablecloth fabric for the main panel! It's really cute!
My husband had stuck a banana peel in the back of my daughter's pants as a joke. My 6-year old son said, "Dad's got a banana, right by his nuggets!" and then pointed to his crotch! He loved these lovely terms for private parts from a fellow kindergartener.
That is such a sweet little apron! Please count me in!
I heart this apron! Truly!
Funny eh?
Well my hubby and I think this is hilarious...
I was prego with #2 and #1 came with me to the Dr.'s office for my monthly pee in a cup.
A lady sitting beside us in the waiting room leans over to #1 and remarks "won't be long now and you'll have a new baby to love"
#1 turns to her and says, with bright eyes I might add,
"yep the dr's going to get it out of mommy's vagina!"
yes. you read that right.
She was 2 1/2 at the time.
Too much information.
Since my kids aren't talking to the point of being funny yet I'm going to have to tell you what a friend's child told me when I went for a tour of their farm right after they moved in. He pointed to the one area when we were in the barn and said that's where he saw the "shit" When his mother asked him about it he said the shit licked his hand there. The light went on. When they first went to look at it the man who had the farm had SHEEP, and apparently were friendly enough to lick his had. Got to love little kids "anything but clear" speech.
Oh, I have so many and most of them come from my oldest daughter who is now 17.
When she was about 3 the only thing i could get her to eat w/ no problem was chicken nuggets, finally in frustration I read her the book "Berenstein Bears and Too much junk food" It mentions Papa bear getting plump, and she asked what plump meant so I told her it was a polite way of saying Papa Bear was getting fat.
Later that afternoon we were in the post office, there was a very large lady in front of us finishing up and had a can of soda in her hands, Victoria went straight over to her, tapped her can, looked straight up at her and said "You've been eating too much junk food." OMG, I have never been so embarrased.
One more: My DH got up one morning to run downstairs and was butt naked, Victoria walked out of her room at just the wrong time, saw him starkers and yelled "Ewww, Daddy, I don't like your butt" Needless to say it wasn't his butt she was talking about.
If you need more, just contact me, i have a book full, LOL.
Congrats on the new baby and thanks for the opportunity to win that cute apron, that I so desperately need
Okay, I have two. Both from my husband as a child.
When asked by the doctor how his new asthma medicine was helping him, four year old Matthew replied, "Well, it makes my penis wiggle!"
The second was as he was sitting in the doctor's office with his mom and 2 week old brother. A stranger said of the newborn, "Oh, he's beautiful!" 3 year-old, jealous Matthew says, "Yeah, well, he eats her breast!"
Adorable apron! If I win, great...if not, hope we brought some levity to your chaotic world!
jmoore3333(at)gmail(dot)com
I dearly love aprons and this is a beauty!
My two year old is currently working on potty training. I walked in the bathroom yesterday where he had removed his diaper. He looked down at a little turd that had fallen on the floor and said, "Look, poop ball!"
Every night before dinner my son (4) asks me what we are having for dinner. One night we were having corn on the cob and salad. My son replies "Oh, thank goodness it isn't vegetables!." I couldn't stop laughing.
my 6 yr old son says lots of great things...
after hurricane ike ripped off the back of his father's house, he says "let's forget the mold. just buy a new house instead."
and: "that cow back there - it's either a girl or a boy. one of those."
at 18 months old, we would pass a cow and he would say (unprompted and we did not teach him this!): "mmmm....cow burger..."
my husband to a friend (who was enjoying her ice cream cone too much): "you can love your ice cream, but don't perform fellatio on it"
Thanks for the chance to win:) I love the apron!
lisa_vander_vliet at hotmail dot com
That is way too cute. I'm an apron girl (I almost typed "a porn girl"... a whole different concept!)
Oh... it is what my kid said that was supposed to be inappropriate... not me.
No really inappropriate comments from them, but when my son was 3, the psunami hit Indonesia and I was explaining to him what had happened. I was being very serious and was really sad about all of those people losing their lives. He was very thoughtful about it for a while and then come to me and said, "Mommy, where can we get enough food to feel the entire world... so that nobody goes hungry?" I had no idea what he was talking about and didn't know how to answer his riddle. Finally, he said, "We should have a salami instead of a psunami!" It did cheer me up which was his goal.
LOL!
Thanks for the great give away!
Lovely!
Know what you mean about being overawed at what people give away. I'm giving away jewellery, but it doesn't seem to match the talent of others like you!
My friend's youngest daughter has said many hilarious things over the years. Two of my favourites are more mispronunciations than anything else:
Credit cards = "Tedit Tards"
High School Musical = "Highsical Musical" (which is how we've referred to HSM ever since!)
Oh so cute!!! I would love to win it! Please count me in! Thank you!!!
My territorial 3 year old then daughter: PAPA! no, no, no, no! {Screaming. Fingers waving, hand on hips} Mama's dedes (boobs) are mine! Don't ever touch them again! (after she saw my hubby poke it jokingly while changing my shirt)
My daughter always said whatever was on her mind, she had a hard time unnderstanding discretion.
When she was three we were visiting her grandparents and my husband's elderly grandmothe rwas brought to meet her for the first time.
My daughter looked up at her and said in a booming voive "You look so old you should be dead".
I wanted to climb in a hole and die myself but his grandmother just laughed it off, she was a really wonderful Irish woman with a great sense of humor.
Sue Cahill (sbonetsue at yahoo dot com)
Yesterday, after a morning of trying to stop my 20 month old son from climbing on every surface in the house, he brought me my shoes and said "BYE!!" I think this was his plan to get rid of me so he could have the house to himself.
Very cute apron.
I'm in. My daughter (aged 6 at the time) told me that she didn't want to get married because when you get married you have to stand in front of people and she's shy....
I have endless funny things that my girls have said but recently my 3 year took to screaming "MY MOM!" whenever she got in trouble or hurt.
We thought it was kind of funny when we realized that this was her way of "cursing" us out! LOL!
The cutest thing my daughter said was in response to me asking her why she was biting her brother. Her response? Because he is tasty.
I blogged about it here
http://capitalmom.blogspot.com/2009/05/conversations-with-girl-3.html
Thanks!
I love this print! My favorite thing that my nephew said was when he was first wearing big boy underwear...they had Bob the Builder on them, and he marched into the living room declaring that "Bob the Builder keeps my p**is warm!" I just about peed. After that my brother-in-law decided they should buy him Barbie underwear.
we had 2 flies in the house this afternoon.... my 13 year old had the fly swatter:
Mitch (using a fly swatter): I SO GOT HIM!
Mom: be sure to throw it away in the trash
Mitch: I don't know where he is, well, I do have half of him
Oh, where to start with the inappropriate things that pop out of my daughter's mouth at the perfect time??? Well, how's this one? In the post office last year, during a particularly busy time my daughter wanted to do knock knock jokes, so she said, "knock Knock"... "who's there?" I replied. "Peace Up!" "Peace Up who?" "HAHAHA Mom!" She yells, "you just said 'piece of poo'!!!"
Or what about the time we were in a nice restaurant and she passed gas? "Ohhh, honey, that was a bit of a stinker" I said in a whisper. "you kinda smell like daddy" I giggled. To which she replied in a nice loud and proud voice "that's because your egg made my pretty hair and Daddy's sperm made my butt!"
Oh, just wait until your little ones start talking!!! I have a 3 month old now and can't wait to see what he comes up with!
Congrats on the new baby!
Ha, okay. Mine requires a story. My niece Maggie is already hilarious and a fashion lover, but a few years ago when she was four, my brother in law and girlfriend were visiting my niece's family. They got in there, and immediately Maggie wants to show off some stuff. The family and BIL and his GF are all in Maggie's room while Maggie dug through her clothes, showing them off to the GF.
My brother-in-law decided to film Maggie with his new phone, and he's filming while she's digging around under the bed. Up pops Maggie, who loves at Christy and says, "Sorry, there's so much crap underneath here."
They all stopped and debated as to what Maggie had said. Finally, BIL plays it back, and yep, Maggie totally said 'crap'. We kept that video!
In a room full of family, my 3 year old nephew runs to his mother, pointed at me and asked, "Why does she have those?!"
We had no idea what he meant until I realized I was nursing at the time and my, ahem, pretties, were not so subtle anymore.
SUch a cute apron!!! I have two boys 13 months apart and my oldest (2 1/2) right now comes up with all kinds of stuff!! The other day I was getting into my jammies and as I was bending down to pick up my pants my 2 1/2 year old says "Oh mama, I love your butt..." I was like, "Where the heck did that come from!" Mind you, my butt is no where NEAR lovely...
mmm... my (then) 3 year old nephew once said to me, while I was wearing a high waisted pants, "gee, your belly is up so high!"
Please count me in too - that apron is fab!
Thats where we were a year ago.....Our oldest was an early talker and very curious.... at about 18 months old we were passing a puppy obedience classes and my husband took her over to look at the puppies. As she got closer she started to say in a very clear and loud voice "daddy that dog has a penis just like you" "and that one has a penis to"......over and over.....hilarious from afar, he couldn't get her away fast enought!!
Oh and love the apron, would love to win it!
Strawberry-rhubarb... Lovely fabric... Looks like this post was made for me !
I have an inappropriate one for you! But please don't judge my parenting :) My two year old daughter (third child) who doesn't have the clearest of speech yet is very expressive. When anything goes even slightly wrong in her world she stops and looks at me. Then put's her hand up and gives her little cheek a pat and says " Oh shit mom"! She is trying to say oh shoot (which is what I say). But of coourse it comes out Oh Shit. Drop cereal box in the check out line....Oh shit mom. Drop a crayon at play group....oh shit mom. You get the idea.
My 4 year old son recently commented "Mom, are you done milking yourself in there yet?". Yes, we live on a dairy farm and yes I have a newborn who I sometimes express breastmilk for and yes I will be writing this one in his baby book.
I love the fabric of the apron! I'm in!
My nephew, at age 1.5 or so, was out and about with his dad. His dad had to use the bathroom, so he took my nephew in with him. While they were standing at the urinal, J--my nephew--looked over at the next guy and said, "My daddy is peeing." The guy said, "Uh-huh." And then J added, "And I can see your weiner."
The guy immediately zipped up and bolted.
What beautiful fabric. Can you have enough aprons? Methinks not.
emadethis.wordpress.com
elizabethmadethis@yahoo.com
The other day my husband told my daughter (she is 2) it was bedtime and she looked at him and said "no thank you daddy, me not tired". It was too funny.
Thanks for the chance to win!
=) melanie
http://melaniescrafts.blogspot.com
melanieadey at hotmail dot com
My middle son threw his eating utensil on the floor of a restaurant when we were out to eat. He yelled "F**k" at the top of his lungs until we figured out he needed his FORK back on the table.
Oh my cute! I love it!! Fabulous talent!! Thanks so much!
Love the apron - such great fabrics. My 5 year old nephew looooves to have his back scratched and last week he told my sister (who is also mother to my 4 year old and 4 month old nephews), that she was the best back scratcher because even if she was busy with the baby he could scratch his back on her legs!
Got to love them.
kareno369(@)hotmail(dot)com
very cute! Thanks!
Hee Hee! I've been reading your comments. They're all pretty funny. When my daughter was about 2, she was really, really into stickers. She went into the bathroom to wash her hands and came out with a maxi pad on her chest and said, "mommy look at this big sticker!"
Oh my . . . the things I could cook if only I had an apron like this to be inspired by.
My 3-year-old is a hoot. Here are a few of her gems:
She said, "Daddy, can you sleep by me tonight?" He replied, "No Sweetie. I have to sleep with Mommy. Otherwise she'll be lonely." To which she said, "No she won't. She can sleep with all of the other daddies."
Another good one is, "Daddy, Mr. Incredible is a fat as you!"
maxandellie at gmail dot com
ooh ooh me I want in and I have been wanting a recipe for that pie I'm gonna have to go find it if I don't win. And that apron is wicked cute!!!
Sophie
YAY!! Something funny... My 3 yo boy has been saying "whoa - gone - liddle" for about 6 mths now and no one has any idea what the word/s mean... it's driving us a little mental...We're having a give away to.
xo Steph
Wonderful apron!
Please enter me in the draw, and don't forget to enter mine. :)
Such a cute apron - who wouldn't enter?!
A few days after my daughter was born, my son said "the baby smells yummy. I want to eat the baby."
iluvchrisnlevi@aol.com
Do I have a blog for you...I wrote down all the funny things my 3 year old cousin said when I lived with him. He's five now, and I don't post anything new but, here's the link:
http://wouldsomeoneplease.blogspot.com/
Some of my favorites are:
Aunt Leslie: Joshua, what should Kimmie call her new dog?
Josh: That dog's name is Bingo.
Me: Okay, Josh. Here we are (at the restaurant). What are you going to have?
Josh: Uh, macaroni and cheese.
Me: Oh yea?
Josh: Uh, yea. Isn't this Macaroni Grill?
Josh *looking at his hands intently*: What are hands for?
lesjoujou AT gmail DOT com
My kids say some hilarious things, but the best one I have ever heard was from one of my preschool students. So picture a two year old girl with her daddy and she walks in on him pee-ing. She asks what he's doing and what is that? like any two year old would and he proceeds to explain that it's a penis and that is how daddies go to the potty, etc., etc. Fast forward to dinner time with dad, mom and two older sisters at a restaurant and said two year old announces to her mom: "Mommy! Daddy's penis--I LIKE it!" I still laugh when I think about that!
memorymaven@gmail(dot)com
After giving birth to twins, I was having a cuddle in our cuddle chair with our 4 year old. "Oh Mum!", he exclaimed. "I think you might have grown - but just on your sides." I knew I'd grown, too but I would rather he hadn't announced it when we had visitors in the house. Lovely apron and best of luck with the mothering.
One of my good friends had two girls, 4 and 2, and a new baby boy. As she was changing her son's diaper, the 4yo commented, "Mommy, Spencer has a tail just like Daddy!".
well, my son was trying to explain to his teacher that his baby sister doesn't eat real food, "she eats mommies milk, you know, from those bumps right here and here" (pointing to his chest each time) haa, haa... she almost died laughing.
Also, after my boys saw Wall-e I was asking them what their favorite part of the movie was, both said "you know when Wall-e puts that girl thing that you put right here (pointing to his chest) on his eyes... that was so funny!"
I think my boys might be obsessed with breasts?! or just very aware! :)
Thanks so much for the chance to win your great apron!! When realizing the other day that Johnny Cash has passed on, my little 4-year old said, "So he really DID fall into a burning ring of fire???" Loved it!!
Oh, I so want to win so I will share this embarrassing moment! At petsmart one day hubby & I started playing with a feather toy for cats. It felt soooo good on the skin! We ended up buying it and at the checkout the clerk asked if our cats liked these toys since she was thinking of buying one - my son helpfully chirped up - "We only have dogs - that's for them" I'm not sure who was more embarrassed - us or her!
I LOVE this apron! What a cute pattern. I remember seeing it on the Angry Chicken flicker. If I can get rhubarb where I live in the Carribean, I am totally making the pie, too!
I got really mad about something and yelled, "GOSH DARN IT!" I then apologized (more for raising my voice than anything) and my 6-year old said, "It's okay mommy. At least you didn't say DAMN I-T" (said "damn" and spelled out "it"). lol
At the school I teach at, on kindergarten students' birthdays the teacher tells a story about their life. She describes the birth as the child coming over a "rainbow bridge" One little boy had recently gotten a new baby sister, and while the teacher was telling his birthday story, he started violently shaking his head, and while motioning between his legs he said "uh uh - I came OUT THROUGH THE VAGINA!! OUT THROUGH THE VAGINA!" the other kids were clueless.
thanks for the chance to win!
theavcp at yahoo dot com
One day my cousins were fighting in the bedroom over whose swimsuit was whose. "It's mine! I peed in it!" he older one said. The younger one replied: "It's mine! I farted in it!"
my son is in a great stage... he learned the word "clock" but forgets the "l" - needless to say... i am constantly embarassed in public :) thank!
Thank you for the chance to win the beautiful apron. My daughter is 3, so it is something funny she did last weekend. A friend of my husbands was visiting us for the first time. My daughter pulled down her pants to show him her new kitty underwear. Luckily he has 3 dayghters and just laughed at her silly behavior!!
Leitinger4152@gmail.com
i love that fabric! thanks for the opportunity!
i am in awe of you mama, new babe and little one too...
so, i said to my 20 month old son yesterday, as we were watching our cats have a darn good scratch...hmmm, i think we need to give them some medicine in case they have fleas or worms.
yes, said jedi very seriously. Or caterpillars.
indeed. sometimes i get a glimpse into the world from his eyes and it must be plain baffling sometimes!
xxx
ummm. my son cannot say fire truck. nope. says something else unrelated to fighting fires...
My older son said to me after my duaghter was born....look her bottom is very different from mine. Well, that is very true!!!
Oh, man. I love this. And I want the pie.
My two year old daughter was in the living room playing with her dolls. My youngest sister and I were arguing over who's turn it was to do dishes. Since my sister was known at that time for being pretty lazy (most 13 year olds are when it comes to housework, right? lol) I eventually gave in and started the dishes myself.
Just as I walked into the living room to check on my daughter, she started talking to her baby doll. She was holding a fake doctor's kit and dug in it for a huge plastic syringe. Then she yelled, "It's an emergency!" She looked up at my sister. "Dr. LazyAss, to the emergency room, stat!" It was the funniest thing ever!
My sister was so embarrassed at being called LazyAss by a two year old that she got up and finished the dishes while I laid on the couch dying of laughter. It was hilarious.
I was changing my sons' nappy a few months back, when he was just learning to talk and I said "let's just get the pilcher."
He tried to repeat what I had said but it came out "bugger."
I love aprons!
The one funny thing (looking back)my son said when he was about 2 was when we were sitting on a beach and a very hairy man walked closely by us. I'm talking about full on shag rug on his back... well, my son pointed at him and squealed with delight... "Look ma, that man looks like a bear!" Needless to say, I turned every shade of red and had to look in the other direction and pretend that he wasn't mine.
BTW.. there is still time to enter my giveaway too.
That is a lovely apron! My little boy, who's 5, is trying to get his head around the concept of time and ages and announced the other day that his great grandad - who's 94 - must have been the first human!! I'm sure he's love to hear that! hee hee
Of course we would love your giveaway and want to comment! This is an awesome apron...hope I win!
My kids were playing Star Wars outside, and my 5-year-old came in crying. "Tomas fired me from being a Jedi!" she wailed. "Why?" I asked. "Because I have gas and Jedis don't have gas!"
Love this apron & I'd definately like the pie recipe too. Awesome giveaway - thanks!
ugli.tangelo.fruit at gmail dot com
love the apron! when my son was four we went to a playoff game for his paran(godfather) for LSU. everyone was toasting the "star" and his toast was,
"beans, beans, the magical fruit,
the more you eat, the more you poot.
the more you poot, the better you feel,
so eat some beans at every meal!" his paran loved it and still talks about 15 years later!!
My daughter was born and raised in Sweden but my family lives in Canada. On a flight over when she was in a rhyming phase she was "going to learn English" on the way. She asked me words, I translated and she repeated. She got stuck on the word duck and made a little singsong that got louder and louder... duck, duck, duck, huck, huck, buck, buck, luck, luck and then came the inevitable f... -she loved my face at that one !
I wish I had a better kid story because this apron is awesome!
The story I can think of is when my co-workers 4 year old was walking around work on Thursday enjoying a dum-dum lollipop. Her mom's boss came up to her, "Emily, what are you eating? A dum-dum?"
Her response, in the loudest voice you can imagine (keep in mind this is an office setting and she's a LOUD 4 year old)... "I AM NOT A DUM DUM!"
I love to record my kid's silly commentary and conversations. HEre are a few of favorites:
"Mom, wouldn't it be cool if we had an elephant?"
I said , "Where would we keep it?" My son offered the backyard, which is only slightly larger than an elephant. At least he didn't offer my bed.
My daughter made the funniest picture on her Doodlepro. It's a "secret door" to the attic. There is a talking "girl sausage" lying in a hammock in front of the door. She's guarding the door to the attic. There is a sign with a circle and a line through it, indicating that there is no gum chewing allowed in the attic.
We recently watched Mary Poppins, and I pointed out that Mary Poppins is played by Julie Andrews, who also played Maria in The Sound of Music.
My son: Where's Maria? Where are the kids?"
Me: She's not Maria in this movie. She's Mary Poppins. And, the kids are in the nursery. They haven't met Maria yet.
Son: No, where are the Von Trapp kids? Is the daddy babysitting them while Maria is Mary Poppins?
What a cute apron!! My sister has been dying for one...and she loves handmade items of all kinds. :)
My 4 year old hit my 2 year old in the back one day and the 2 year old started crying. I asked the 4 year old what happened and he said "I hit him in the back. Guess what Mom, I bet he didn't see that coming!"
Luckydux@sbcglobal.net
We just got a puppy, and on his first morning here, he scratched my almost 3yo. Gramma and Pap got him for her birthday, and they got him some things like toys and a leash. When Gramma came for lunch, she said "Gramma, you need to get him some new paws."
Shawna
okay.
this is downright embarrassing. what i will do for a giveaway.
my son was 4. he wanted to go to a Mother/Daughter thing at the church. i kept explaining why he couldn't go and he would walk away, all sad... then he came running into the room and proclaimed:
I HAVE A GREAT IDEA! I'll pull my hair into a pony. I'll put some girl clothes on. and then, i'll wear a sign that says (ready for this?) "I HAVE NO PENIS".
we haven't teased him about that in years and he is 24 in july, don't you think it's about time?
Oh I love aprons. I have even joined the apron nation "Ning" group
Well, my (20 month) son doesn't talk yet (or maybe he does but we can't tell what the heck he's saying--drives me nuts) but he did do something funny a couple of weeks ago.
He knows some baby signs, like more, help, eat and drink. He and I went to the Museum of Science and Industry (a few blocks from our home) and went to see the chicks being hatched. We walked up to the incubator side where the chicks had just been hatched or were in the process of it. He was all, meh, whatever. We walk over the the other side where they're incubating just eggs. As soon as he saw the eggs, he started making the sign for eat. (His dad makes him eggs for breakfast every weekend.) I started laughing so hard I was almost crying and I couldn't exactly share it with anyone there.
O.K, so I just heard this one today: My friend has a two year old with an ever expanding vocabulary. She had recently bought her new shoes, pink with white rubber tips on the toes. Well, her daughter started calling the tips "icing" and her mother told her, "no, the white is rubber, not icing." Later that afternoon, they go to a wedding, where they are meeting my friend's sister (the little girls aunt) and she announces to her aunt, but loud enough for everyone around her to hear: "Hey Aunt Sally, how do you like my rubbers?"
Also, as I was typing this I thought of another funny story involving another very smart child. My husband has a cousin who is very smart and was reading at age 3. He could not sound out words, but read a lot by sight. At the time, he was obsessed with states and capitols. His mother took him along to her OBGYN appointment and he began "reading" the posters on the wall. He looked at one and said "Mom, it says that this is a Virginia, this doesn't look like a Virginia."
Mother's Day 22 years ago. We were at my Grandmother's church with my Dad, aunts, uncles and cousins. Boy was 2 years old and I was pregnant with Girl. The preacher gave his sermon and then asked us to bow our heads to pray. We did. Boy did too. "Now I lay me down to sleep......" He didn't bother slowing down as the preacher attempted to pray over our snuffled giggles.
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