Phew...I didn't really plan to be away from this space for so long. And, I missed it and I even kept composing posts in my head and then never finding the time to get. it. all. down! But, it's been a busy sewing whirl of activity in my parts.
When I left my job at the start of the year I knew that I wanted to integrate sewing instruction and just plain old sewing into my weekly, if not daily, life. I knew I didn't want the kids pulled out of their preschools completely and this would mean I have some time to myself. I knew a few people interested in learning to sew and excited to take a class with me. I knew all those things, but here are ten things I didn't know:
1. I didn't know it would be easy to convince my church to let me use the basement, on a regular basis to hold classes.
2. I didn't know I had it in my ever-cautious and deliberate nature to spontaneously say "Yes, I will buy those 4 sewing machines you are offering me at a steal."
3. I didn't know that same cautious nature would find the courage to dream out loud.
4. I didn't know that every time I dreamt out loud someone in the room would say "I can help you do that? A web site? Sure, I know a guy....A facebook page? I can start it for you. Buzz and word of mouth? My speciality. A sewing machine? You can have this one that I never use."
5. I didn't know that every step I took away from the base of the tree and further out onto the branches and limbs would leave me feeling vulnerable and raw for a day...and then I would get over it. And, I would feel even more courageous afterwards.
6. I didn't know there would be days. DAYS! when I got nothing concrete accomplished and that it would drive me nuts and I would be wracked with guilt for not at least accomplishing something to help family life run smoothly. Then, suddenly I would work like a fiend and it would all come together.
7. I didn't know that people were serious, very serious about wanting to learn to sew and they would show up for class and want to talk sewing at every daycare drop off and we would develop inside jokes about bias tape and my husband would catch them chatting about fabric around town.
8. I didn't know that it would all begin to grow into something more like community...that it would mean a lot to take time out of the house, away from the kids or responsibilities, to sew something and to talk to each other. I didn't realize quite how much that feeling of making something that I love would also be loved in the same way by other people. Maybe even more because we are doing it together and each class would end with everyone looking at me saying "What is next?"
9. I didn't know what would be involved in being my own manager, website designer, bookkeeper, accountant, scheduler, fabric buyer, and social media player. That it would mean I barely sew for myself at all. That I might feel compelled, on a day like today, to make a single bean bag just to combat that feeling.
10. I didn't know this post would make me a little weepy....
I didn't know a lot. And, I still don't know a lot. But, I'm learning and I'm so excited to share more as it all develops (like a new name!) and this whole new chapter develops.
What exactly am I doing? I don't know, it's evolving and maybe I am to. Or maybe I'm just going nuts and my family will look back on this as that weird 'sewing phase' but either way it is making for good stories in my old age.
around the bend
1 week ago